


The Water Slide Story

by XaviaAndromedovna



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Backstory, Canon Trans Character, Canon-Typical Sexism, Discrimination, Drowning Mention, F/M, Marijuana, Objectification, Outing, RvB Rare Pair Week, Transphobia, Tucker being an ass, wardrobe malfunction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-13
Updated: 2017-05-13
Packaged: 2018-10-31 06:13:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10893393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XaviaAndromedovna/pseuds/XaviaAndromedovna
Summary: Tucker and Grif discuss the first time they saw a girl naked.





	The Water Slide Story

“And that’s the first time I saw a girl naked.”

Grif takes an amused draw of his cigarette. “Where’d you get the trampoline?”

Tucker scoffs. “ _That’s_ the part you have questions about?”

“Honestly, it’s the only part that surprises me.”

Tucker finishes rolling the joint and pulls out his lighter to dry it. “I dunno dude, I think I borrowed it from the basketball team. Point is, I was the most popular mascot the school ever had.”

“Sounds like a really hard title to win.”

“Whatever, what about you? When was the first time you saw a girl naked?”

“I don’t remember; I have a younger sister, so probably when we were little.”

“Eww, gross man, I meant like a non-relative!”

The orange soldier takes a long puff of the joint as he considers the question. “When I was 16, my first girlfriend. Heather Ash.”

“Aww man, is this about to get NSFW?!”

“No, but it does involve a broken nose and being banned from a waterpark.”

“…I’m listening.”

~~~

Every year, the sophomores take a class trip to the mainland for some loosely-defined educational reason that the students never paid attention to. All Grif cares about is that he’ll be rooming with his two best friends and his girlfriend will be staying right across the hall. For a week. A week of not having to watch Kai, not having to do real schoolwork, a week of hanging out with his friends, a week of making out with Heather—this is going to be great.

And it is, up until about two days before they’re scheduled to leave. The group is at a water park and after sitting through the demonstration about fluid dynamics they are free to do whatever. Heather is looking phenomenal in a hot pink bikini top with a black swim skirt. It’s fairly modest considering the other girls’ outfits, but it makes her look classy. (Of course, she points out that such a comparison is sexist and slut-shamey, but he stands by his point.)

It’s a little surprising then that Heather is the one who ends up getting in trouble for indecent exposure. It all happens when they go on the tallest waterslide in the park. All the way up, she was adjusting and readjusting her bottoms, and he could tell she was getting nervous. He assumed it was just the heights. When it’s his turn, he goes down the slide and swims to the side to wait for Heather. As he found out later, when the lifeguard signaled she could get into position, she slipped and ended up going down the slide full-speed. All he knows is that she comes roaring out the end, legs spread wide, and out of the side of her bottoms her sizeable genitalia are peeking out.

Several things happen at once. Grif suddenly realizes his girlfriend is transgender. Everyone _else_ in the vicinity realizes his girlfriend is transgender, including several of their classmates. The parents in the area are shooing their children away and look like they’re about to go complain to somebody. The lifeguard is too busy laughing to do anything about the fact that she hasn’t surfaced yet. Grif takes the initiative to get back in the wading pool to see if she’s okay.

She surfaces by the time he reaches her, having readjusted herself in the water. He knows that she knows that he knows and her panic is radiating off of her at the fact. “Are you okay?” he asks, directing her to the edge.

“Did anyone see?” He doesn’t answer, she can tell by the way everyone is staring at her. A random boy comes up to them with an evil smirk on his face. The next thing Grif knows he’s being pulled off the guy while the asshole bleeds from his nose and the lifeguard is ushering everyone out of the area.

~~~

“Long story short, she was outed to the whole school in less than twenty minutes, the slide was shut down for an hour, and I’m permanently banned from the waterpark. Also I wasn’t allowed to leave my hotel room for the rest of the trip and I was suspended for like two weeks.”

Tucker is staring at him hard. “Holy shit.”

“Yeah.”

“I can’t believe you didn’t know your girlfriend had a dick!”

**Author's Note:**

> Written for RvB Rare Pair Week! Fun fact: the actual slide part of the story is embarrassingly true, though luckily no one seemed to notice.


End file.
